A Lesson in Cosmetology
by Elphie Bubble
Summary: Ah, poor Elphie didn't realize that rule number one is staying away from Galinda when she has a brush and hairspray... [Rather Whimsical Oneshot][GelphieFriendship][MusicalWorld] R&R!


Just another of my oneshots that I write in the middle of the night while being half asleep. Please review and happy Late Easter!

**Disclaimer:** Wicked ain't mine.

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Elphaba's hair was driving Galinda crazy. The long silky black tresses were almost always forced into rigid braids and smothered under one of Elphaba's very ugly skull caps. As far as Galinda was concerned, it was as bad as murder. The only opportunity she had to see it down was right after Elphaba got out of the shower ever morning. Even during these brief moments, Elphaba was already in the process of braiding the soaking mass before going to sleep.

Galinda longed to touch and style it, but she was afraid that Elphaba would nip at her like an annoyed dog. Or worse, it might ruin their tentative friendship.

One evening, though, Galinda resolved to go through with it.

"Elphie?" she quivered nervously from her bed.

Elphaba looked up from her book, "Yeah?"

"I was wondering if maybe I could, uh, play with your hair?"

Elphaba stared at her for a full thirty-seven seconds (Galinda counted).

"You want to _what_ with my hair?" Elphaba asked after the tense thirty-seven seconds had passed.

"Um, play."

Elphaba stared at her again.

"You know, like brush and fix…" Galinda stuttered.

Elphaba was showing no signs of letting up with the staring.

"…and stuff," Galinda finished lamely.

Elphaba, who was getting quite good at staring by now, continued on with her new hobby.

"Never mind," said Galinda, giving up.

"No," Elphaba suggested.

"What?"

"I won't 'never mind,'" Elphaba said, using air quotes, "You can play with my hair if you like," she enunciated the play as if she still wasn't sure what Galinda meant and shrugged.

"Really?!" gasped Galinda. She squealed when Elphaba nodded and leaped from her bed all the way across to Elphie's, nearly landing on top of the green girl who was beginning to look like she wished she hadn't agreed to this.

"My hair's all greasy, you know," Elphaba said as Galinda started to take down the braid.

"Nonsense," Galinda replied. Elphie's hair was soft and smooth. However, Galinda was disappointed that even being held in a tight braid all day couldn't curl the long black hair. It hung there, shiny and straight as an architecturally stable pillar. As Galinda ran her fingers through it, she noticed that Elphaba stiffened slightly. She wondered sadly to herself if anyone had ever touched her green roommate when she was young.

"What are you going to do with it?" Elphaba asked, almost nervously.

"I don't know yet. Hush now."

Elphaba was silent for a moment before speaking again, "Why have you stopped?" For several seconds now, Galinda had sat silently with her hands in her lap behind Elphaba.

"I'm envisioning what to do with your hair, of course," she said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"My head isn't a block of marble to sculpt."

"It's the same basic principle," Galinda snapped, completely serious, "Now sit _still_, would you?"

Elphaba sighed in mock exasperation, but she sat still for Galinda. After a few more moments of envisioning, Galinda started brushing and teasing Elphaba's hair with great enthusiasm.

"Why do you care about this so much?" Elphaba asked.

"Why do I care about anything? Because it's fun!" Galinda exclaimed. Elphaba shrugged; such a concept had never occurred to her before.

"Fun, huh? So," Elphaba said ponderously, "Playing with my hair goes into the same category as pink things, ice cream, glitter, and bouncing around like a jumping bean?"

"Weelll," Galinda said, chewing the inside of her lip and gazing at the piss-colored ceiling, "It comes in close second to ice cream, but yeah, it's definitely in the same category."

Elphaba tried to wait patiently for a few moments, she really did, but she kept thinking about how interesting her book had been. It was an account of the first dictators of Oz, and she very much enjoyed reading about how High Lord Priccipus had outlawed brothels and the color yellow successfully for the almost ninety years of his reign.

"Are you almost done?" she asked, fidgeting.

"No!" Galinda barked, "I haven't even finished brushing it yet!"

Elphaba sighed loudly and overdramatically, something she had learned from Galinda.

"No amount of world-suffering sighs are going to make me stop," Galinda said chidingly, "Now, there's this adorable hair style that I've been dying to try out, but my hair's too short to do it on. Yours, though, should work perfectly!"

"Great…" Elphaba said in a mockery of Galinda's brightness.

"Now, this may hurt a litt--" Galinda started.

"OUCH!" Elphaba finished, rubbing her scalp.

"Sorry. No pain, no gain, right?" Galinda thought for a moment while applying copious amounts of hairspray, "Actually, it's more true if you say, 'no pain, no cute boyfriends.'"

Elphaba snorted.

"You mustn't snort, Elphie. Snorting will completely undo all the good this hairdo is going to do you."

Galinda tugged one last strand into place and squealed. She jumped off of Elphaba's bed to grab her mirror and re-approached the bed, hiding it behind her back.

"Now, no peeking yet!" she said.

"What'd you do to me?" Elphaba asked, feeling her head and having her hands slapped away by Galinda.

"Don't mess it up! You look marvelous. Here, look," Galinda said, handing her the mirror.

Elphaba took one look in the mirror and doubled over in laughter.

Galinda's copyrighted pout was only seconds behind and she snatched the mirror back and glared at her giggling roommate.

"I worked hard on that!" she said indignantly, failing to see what was so funny about Miss Elphaba's new hairstyle.

"I'm s-s-sorry!" Elphaba choked between laughs, "I look like a-a-a--"

"A what?!" Galinda demanded.

"A moose!" Elphaba wheezed, clutching her stomach, "You gave me antlers!"

Galinda took another look at Elphaba's hair and had to admit that the green girl had a fair point. Her black hair was done in several knots atop her head and did resemble antlers a little. Before she could reclaim her pout, Galinda had begun to giggle along with her. When at last their chortles had become quiet sniggers and had finally subsided, Elphaba smirked.

"Now it's my turn to do _your_ hair, Miss Upland," she said with a wicked smile, picking up the brush and hairspray and wielding them like the dangerous weapons they could be.


End file.
